Cultivating Faith

All day long everyday I walk through whatever comes my way while trusting in Jesus to guide me. And he does guide me. But some days he has to guide me through some uncomfortable things. Now I know that I’m in school and he is teaching me as I walk. I’ve learned that his purpose is that I might learn how to rest in his comforts at all times, whatever is happening. I struggle mostly with my own inexperience as I seek to learn a more godly response to each experience. When hearts go into territory where they’ve never been things we’ve never realized were there will surface. These things have to be uprooted.

I’m sure now that He is always for me and never against me. I do give it my all and do as well I’m able while dealing with things that are way beyond my ability to understand. Or enjoy. My flesh tries to trouble me but my God is reassuring me that his refining processes are for my good. I think my fears and insecurities are proof that my flesh is weak. Yet I’ve learned where my help comes from and I run quickly to seek it. I find new proof daily of his excellent perfections over my imperfections. My fear of messing up sometimes keeps me quiet and I find that silence really is golden at times. Some communications often take me down emotional trails I don’t need to travel. Yet He calms me as I suffer through and my doubts and fears are purged and a new and stronger me emerges. I’m thankful that He is faithful to bring course corrections when there is a need to. Self control is a fruit of the spirit that grows gradually and we have to learn to cultivate it and keep it healthy. Just as we would a house plant.

If you go through times like this, know that you are not alone. We are in a process of going through to come through. And as we go we are being refined for our ministry of advancing his kingdom and prosperity for our future. We are being stretched and we are growing. Walk in the spirit and we will not obey the lusts of the flesh.

“As we behold the glory of the Lord we are changed into the same image from glory to glory even as by the Spirit of the Lord” Jude 24

An Altar Of Thanksgiving

This is a few of my personal memories and lessons about life, death and growing in grace. I’m a widow, and since my husband died in July 2011 I’ve spent some time reminiscing about all of these things. And about old pleasures we enjoyed together. He passed on after a long battle with cancer and I’ve been coming through some seasons of re-adjusting to life alone. He had lived 73 years when he passed, and he was able to enjoy about 10 years of retirement and rest after working as a plumber for over 40 years. My memories were hard to deal with for quite awhile, but gradually Father God brought healing and grace to my heart and life and helped me to look back on some of these old days with pleasure. And on new lessons being learned from them. This is an altar to the Lord for thanksgiving for all the goodness he has shown to us over the years.

For the last few years we lived in a small place on the lake and we enjoyed feeding the birds and whatever animals came around. He loved dogs and he would adopt stray dogs who came around looking lonesome and hungry. I remember about 3 dogs who would come and eat and then after awhile they would wander off somewhere again. We had one neighbor dog who showed up regularly. If a couple of days went by and he didn’t come, Bill would worry about him. But he never stayed away long. Mostly though, the bird watching and feeding became a real source of pleasure for us. We saw redbirds, mockingbird, grackles, blackbird, bluejay and dove. And the dove were our favorite bird. Bill was a man who had a trust in the Lord and who was learning a little more about relationship and prayer. We loved the old song “On The Wings Of A Dove” and one day I sang it to him as we sat there on the porch talking about God.

Hear song…

The song really touched his heart and he began to connect the coming of the dove with God bringing them as a sign of his love. And I thought so too. He always credited the Lord for the way he put feed out and so many dove would gather.


In the driveway across from our house we would scatter seed and flocks would come and feed. This was a flock of about 30 dove. There were several varieties of the native birds that came and occasionally we saw white dove.


They would come a few at a time and gather on the phone lines and in the trees. They would sit there for awhile and then few would swoop down and start feeding and the others would follow.  The picture of the dove on highwire here is off the web. We didn’t have quite this many, but we loved watching the lines to see how many would perch there.

highwire dove

After he died the dove just quit coming. For a very long time I saw few. After he passed I kept putting seed out and I would watch and never could understand why. I kept talking to all my family about how strange this was to me. Then one day as I sat on my porch thinking about this, I had a thought, more like a voice saying “Don’t be lonesome for dove.” Finally I began to understand that God was using the dove as a blessing to him and as lessons to us both. But times and seasons change as we go, and it was time to begin a new season. I was learning to stop longing for things that had been and yielding to the Lord as I was learning how to adapt to a new season. God has been rebuilding my life and I have come to a new place of joy and contentment in my new life alone. I still think often of these sweet days but my grief has been dealt with and I no longer yearn to live in them. I’m learning that we are not to become dependent on a man, a blessing, a season but on our Father and his present day words alone.

Now I see new horizons and I’m excited!  The thoughts of how I’ve seen him do such mighty things in the past keep me fired up for what he has yet to do. I’m not at all sure exactly what the future holds but I know I will delight in it as long as I hold fast to his hand.

If we will watch and stay alert God will always speak to us. He speaks in many ways, through His creation, song, story, his holy bible and through others. And he speaks personally face to face with all who seek to know him as their one source of all good things. …Thank you Father for this great new season of new life..


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